Social Media What Does It Mean to Respond With a Period
Technology keeps people connected in fantastic new ways just also introduces troublesome gray areas when information technology comes to advice. In his first volume, 11 Points Guide to Hooking Up, comedy writer Sam Greenspan offers tips for handling dating sites, Facebook Walls and other potentially dating pitfalls of the modernistic world.
To get a taste of what Greenspan, creator of the eleven Points website, has to offer, cheque out this excerpt from his book on the hush-hush meanings of punctuation in text messages. xi Points Guide to Hooking Up hits stores Midweek.
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The way you use an exclamation point can change your dating life.
Texting removes the song cues nosotros one time used to overanalyze if someone liked us. Now nosotros accept to wait at 140 to 160 characters -- and with less raw data to work with, our overanalyzing hits a whole different level of insanity. One fundamental aspect of that insanity is reading mode as well much into every nuance of every text message, especially punctuation. So ... here are the clues his/her punctuation choices are sending (and besides the clues you're sending right back).
- Period.
Meaning: You don't desire to keep going back and forth all night.
In texting, y'all don't have to stop a sentence with any punctuation. It's totally acceptable to only let it dangle. So using a flow gives a certain air of finality to a statement. Compare:
I'yard heading out to the party now.
I'thousand heading out to the party now
In the first ane, the meaning is clear: we've had our back-and-forth over text, but I accept plans, and they practise not include continuing this conversation -- menstruation. In the second one, *without the period, it feels much more than open-ended * -- I'm heading out to the party now but who knows what I'm doing later, and you only might be part of it. Periods stop things. Leaving 1 out keeps things open.
- Exclamation Point!
Meaning: Something betwixt playful and drastic, depending on usage.
The assertion point is the most valuable punctuation mark you have in your arsenal, simply information technology's besides the most dangerous. When used properly, a single exclamation signal tin can set a light tone, convey excitement, and even demonstrate interest. Compare:
Sounds good. Not sure if nosotros're going simply I might see you at the political party. If you leave, let me know
Sounds good. Not sure if nosotros're going but I might see you at the party. If you go out, allow me know!
The person in the 2nd instance seems far, far more than interested in getting together ... and did information technology without changing a word .
>It'south always better to play it cool than to play it like a 12-year-onetime writing YouTube comments.
But be conscientious. Assertion points are the most driveling slice of punctuation in our world today. When you showtime overusing exclamation points, y'all look like an apprentice:
Sounds good! Not sure if we're going but I might encounter you at the party! If you lot get out, let me know!
The kickoff exclamation point is OK ... the second is way likewise overeager ... and the third is but flat-out desperate. And when in doubt, get rid of the exclamation indicate. It's e'er better to play information technology cool than to play it like a 12-year-quondam writing YouTube comments.
- Semicolon.
Significant: You're trying likewise hard.
No i uses semicolons in mean solar day-to-mean solar day casual writing; information technology's a literary piece of punctuation, non a colloquial i. So using a semicolon in a text shows you've thought out, revised, and overedited your message. That means y'all're trying too hard, and there's nothing worse than trying too hard. A semicolon in a text message is the equivalent of putting on makeup to go to the gym .
- Apostrophe.
Meaning: Yous pay attending to the little things.
In text country, apostrophes have become endangered species. Youd is just as adequate at y'all'd. Id is just every bit acceptable equally I'd. Youre is but as acceptable every bit you lot're. (Or, on the Net, your.)
And so when you actually accept the time to use an apostrophe, it means something. I like to think information technology sends a subconscious bulletin that yous take the extra fourth dimension to do things right . And that effort hints that y'all'd exist a real hard-working giver in a relationship -- or at least into one extremely memorable sexual escapade.
- Left and Correct Braces.
Meaning: You're approaching this as well logically.
In my feel, no one uses the left and correct braces unless they're a math guy or computer programmer. Either fashion, they're looking at the current romantic state of affairs very, very logically . Warning: Computer programming joke ahead.
if (texts == playful) {
ask("Practice you want to grab a drink sometime?")
}
else if (texts 6. Asterisk.
Meaning: You're agape the person isn't equally cool every bit you.
The primary reason people use asterisks in a text is to censor a discussion, for example: "I like deep-fried sandwiches so my friends call me the C*** of Monte Cristo. Little practise they know I'm plotting my elaborate revenge on them."
And there's really only i reason to censor a swear discussion: if you're afraid the person's not as cool equally yous . Because if they were, they'd run around dropping f-bombs and c-bombs and f'd-in-the-a-with-your-ain-d-bombs without the censorship.
And then asterisks imply that yous don't think that person likes information technology raw, like you (and ODB). Save the asterisks for funny usage, something like this: "I bet you $65,000* that I am a ameliorate bowler than you.
*prize may be substituted for firm handshake or 1 turn at claw game."
- Plus Sign.
Significant: Y'all've got it bad.
If you use the plus sign in lieu of the give-and-take "and" or an ampersand, it'south your subconscious telling you lot that you really like the person. When couples cleave their names into copse, they utilise a plus sign between them. "Laura + Mike. July 1991. I practice it for y'all"; "Joe + Susan. Jan 1998. Our hearts will go on"; "Logan + Madison. August 2010. California gurls."
A plus sign doesn't merely translate to "and" ... it's a symbolic unification . And then if you send the text "Me + yous should go to Medieval Times," you're really carving those Medieval Times plans -- and the honey therein -- into a tree.
- Emoticons.
Meaning: You want to bring the conversation to life.
Texting is a faceless, emotionless means of communication. So no matter how middle school-ish they are, emoticons tin can be the best mode to make your texts feel three-D (and not crappy, retrofitted iii-D like they're using in movies to add to the ticket prices. Good 3-D).
For women, use them advisedly. Too many and you wait immature . I had a friend who was texting with a girl and every single bulletin she sent contained the winky face up. It's like she was outsourcing her texting to a seventh grader. (Or that her emoticon had some kind of palsy.)
And if you're male ... steer very clear. Any ratio higher than one emoticon per one hundred texts is pure toxicant.
- Ellipses.
Meaning: You want the person to read betwixt the lines.
Using ellipses in a text is your way of proverb what you either tin't say yet (considering information technology'd fall under the "as well before long" umbrella), or what you are agape to say (because you're agape yous'll seem disagreeable or high maintenance). Check out this instance:
Yeah, Kickboxer 4 could work ... I've besides heard practiced things nigh that Katherine Heigl film Falling in Love Is Smashing* ... either style, encounter y'all there at 8?*
It'due south clear what that text really means: "I'd rather die than see a movie about the undercover world of kickboxing, and you're an idiot for suggesting that nosotros become see it. I'd rather see a romantic comedy. And now, because this has gotten a little awkward, I recall nosotros should see at the theater so I accept an escape program."
You tin can too use ellipses in a positive way, to become the person'southward imagination going:
Had perhaps a few besides many drinks last nighttime ... legs are sore from dancing ... in the bathtub right at present ...
That text takes three statements and simply loads them with sexual undertones thanks to the ellipses. (Unless a guy sent that text. Then information technology's just kind of odd.)
- Question Marks.
Meaning: It depends on how many question marks you use.
Question marks have a tendency to stack onto each other. And with each stack the meaning changes .
What fourth dimension do you desire to meet up? Simple, unassuming, and friendly. Gets the point across, elicits a response, but besides drives toward a solution.
What fourth dimension do you want to meet upwards?? Looks like a typo.
What time do you want to encounter up??? Feels impatient, childish. It's an aggressive question: It demands a response, and suggests that the response had improve be to your liking.
What time do y'all want to meet up???? Cycles dorsum to playful. At present it's a joke. If you (God forbid) talked to the person on the phone, you might sing-say that entire question.
What time do yous desire to come across upwardly????? Too many. Now information technology'southward but confusing. Why were five question marks necessary? This seems like the kind of person who would write "kewl."
Then ... use i question mark to simply motility the conversation along, and four to move it along flirtatiously. Anything else and you're doing it wrong.
- Tilde.
Meaning: You're either a punctuation main not confined to the traditional system ... or you lot're Hispanic.
Either manner, you sound like a grab to me .
See Besides:- iii Smart Things Nigh Online Dating
- Trouble Hooking Up? At that place'southward an App for That
- Book Excerpt: Always On: How Smartphones Modify Policing
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